becca261

I had lost 50 pounds FIFTY pounds…  just to put 30 of it back on.   Heres the real kicker im getting married in one month and I couldnt have gained my motivation back months ago???  I think that the dress is is what started my downfall anyway.  I went to try on dresses and of course dresses are not the size you normally wear they like to make you feel like a house lol.  Either way after all the praise i had been getting and how great i felt when i looked in the mirror for some reason that day it all came crashing down and instead of making it a lets keep going and get some where you can be proud of your self i made it a lets go to red robin and eat burgers and mayo.  Enough of the rant I started back a couple of days ago with the walking and a good diet.  I know i cant lose all 30 back in a month for my BEACH WEDDING ( god Im an idiot) lol but i can get on track and feel better and then kick the rest of this weight in due time.  So heres to restarts why do we do this to ourselves??

 I have offically lost 25 pounds to date.  Not to blow my own horn but I feel amazing!!!!  The last time I did Weight Watchers I lost 20 and stopped but this time I dont see myself stopping.  Its a great feeling to when you realize that food dosent control you anymore.  I control my own life and what happens to me and I am capable of making the changes to do it.  I have alot of work ahead of me and im sure that its going to get harder but today is a day to celebrate..I think I’ll take a walk

I have for the past couple of months really worked my ass off.  I am eating great on a constant basis.  I have up-ed my exercise tremendously…..and yet still I am at a stand still.  Last week I have stuck with the same diet as the previous week and I walked a total of 18 miles.  I pushed myself during these miles too, it wasnt just a leisure walk.  Yet when I went to my WW meeting I had gained +.2 pounds.  Im soo discouraged at this point i mean if you look at my weight I dont understand why with all this effort and I do mean all this effort its just not really coming off still at this point.  Please I will take any suggestions

For 7 days I have binged and binged.  I ate everything like it was my last meal and lets face it….it kinda is.  But I am happy to say today I start back at my ww meetings with a fantastic friend who I know is going to push my chubby ass lol right into atleast fitting into my swimming suit….I doubt i will leave my house in it though but its a step in the right direction.  Got my bike all ready and planning on buying a kayak and I really think that with how stoked I am about this Im going to make some great progress.    Now just to get past the weigh-in…ugg

4 weeks into my “weight loss” and I decide to quit smoking.  Its been two days since I have had a cigarette and I have to say I am feeling a ton of pressure about all of this.  I mean eating and smoking are my two biggest vices and my previous success rates for quitting both are not good.  So now I have this huge thing over my head saying “its a matter of time before one slips which is it going to be”  I really want to be focused on losing weight I should have waited for the smoking till I had a better grip on the weight.  But now its too late the boyfriend quit smoking with me and if i smoke again well its a bit like giving up on him.  Why is being healthy such a hard thing for me?  Im giving myself this one day to be angry at myself and that I did horrible at my diet this last two days and then tommorow right back at it.  Must keep pushing!!  Something good has to come out of this.

This is no excuse and I know that.  Trust me 28 years of making excuses like I will  definatly exercise longer tommorow so that I can eat that giant cheeseburger, I know that having bad days does not allow you to binge.  I had two extremely stressful days, and last night the me Im trying to run from came out and ate some pizza hut.  I must say it was delicous but not worth the horrible feeling I am feeling today about it.   This week I havent exercised nearly enough and now pizza hut.  Ugg  its a constant battle.  Today I start over.  But if for nothing eles I take comfort in the fact that Im doing it.  I mean Im still waking up today not giving up on myself and pushing myself to find the better me.